Quality vs. Quantity

This has been an ongoing debate in our household since we found out about Brandon's Brain Cancer. This is a debate I wish we could of gone our whole lives without having, but now that we are in this position it's a much needed discussion. My views on everything have been more of a selfish one. I want him here next to me until were old and grey and he has to change my depends lol. I've done lots of endless research and spent many nights not sleeping trying to figure out the best course of treatment for this type of cancer. What many doctors and hospitals suggest is to remove as much of the tumor as possible. This gives radiation and chemotherapy the best chances at killing what tumor cells are left, but in Brandon's case this is a hard one. His tumor lies in such a high real estate area where he could potentially never speak again and may have weakness on the right side of his body. Dr. S discussed that he wants to try a new procedure to keep him awake during surgery so there is a lesser chance of this happening. As you may know they tried to do an awake surgery the last time but there were issues with the intubation tube and the anatomy of Brandon's neck. This time around he won't have an intubation tube down his throat but will be given 2 different medications to perform this and wake him up when it's time. Next week they will be performing a Functional MRI to see exactly where and what parts of the brain the tumor is affecting. This is one thing I'm really looking forward to, since it will give us all a better picture of what is really going on.

So back to our debate. I have to say in my heart I want the functional MRI to come back and say they have a good chance of resecting part of the tumor. But on the other hand I know my hubby is not fond of the fact of having surgery again, being there's a chance he will not be able to speak. His aspect on everything has been Quality of life. If they say he only has 5 years then he wants to be able to at least speak to his kids and tell them everything they need to know in that 5 years. Instead of having 10 years of not being able to tell his story. I have been the selfish one wanting the most time I can have with him, but I understand exactly where he is coming from. I guess as a mother I would want all the time in the world to be with my family, but it would be hard not to speak to them and tell them what life has to offer and how to become the most amazing adults I know they will be one day. Brandon always tells me "You may say you would want the surgery now cause your not the one who has the tumor". And he's right I do say that, but would I feel the same way if I were in his shoes. I don't know, that's the hard part. So now we wait for our next chapter in the journey to start. I know Brandon feels very anxious to get all of this started and so do I. I just want him to have the best chances of fighting this beast and kicking it's ASS. Hopefully next week we will have more answers for all of you. Keep those prayers and good thoughts coming our way cause we need every single one of them.

P.S. we had an amazing time in the east coast. It was so nice to see my family and spend time with some amazing friends over there as well. For that one week it felt like cancer wasn't around and we got back to our normal lives. Let me tell you we ate so much good food it was worth the extra pounds I put on. And if your ever in NYC make sure you to stop at Five Napkins, those burgers, fries, taquitos and S'mores Shakes are to die for.

For those of you wanting to purchase t-shirts click here. Thanks to those of you that have purchased them already. I will be shipping those out later this week.

XOXOXO,

Momo

The loves of my life

My mini me

My amazing parents..Thank you again for making our trip one to remember

My hubby looks hot..me not so much with my fro lol

Our little family

Oh and BTW cancer after were done kicking your ass we will be going here. Make sure our cabana boy or girl has my umbrella drink waiting for me as soon as I hit the sand. =)

Bora Bora..my dream destination